That’s the question I’m asking today.  Why me?  Why my Mom?  Why two weeks before Christmas?  Why does Nate, who has slept like a rock star since he was 3 weeks old, suddenly feel the need to be up every two hours all night long? 

The sad thing is…I think I know most of the answers.  Unfortunately knowing the answers is not making this whole ordeal any easier to handle.  I have a fabulous support system: a wonderful husband; the best sister in the world; a fairly close-knit extended family; and great friends.  The hospital staff who are caring for my Mom are more than anyone could ask for.  But I’m still tired (I’m pretty sure I can blame that on the sleepless nights with Nate!) and stressed and what I really want is to pretend none of this ever happened and go home to Comox for Christmas.  I feel guilty about a million different things that I’m sure I have no need to feel guilty about, but the feeling persists just the same.

The good news is that there are signs of improvement in Mom’s condition.  The bad news is she is still critically ill and there is a long long road ahead of her to reach full recovery. 

You’re probably all wondering (especially the non-bloggy people) why I am wasting precious minutes while Nate is napping to post?  Even I’m not sure why.  I think it is because blogging has become my outlet, my release, a way to get my thoughts and feelings out there.  As much for me to examine them as for you.  I think it will help…hope it will help. 

Since everything so far has seemed pretty bleak, I thought we could all use a little cheering up.  And what better to cheer us all up (although especially me!) than a picture of Nate all bundled up for an outing in the snow?  He is already 12 weeks old by the way!  Can you believe that?  I know I’m having trouble with it.

aboniable-snow-baby.jpg

So thanks for “listening” to me whine.  I feel a bit better already!

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